A Different Path
by Quryuu
Summary: What if Dean got tired of being abandoned? Set slightly pre-series and Season 1


Alt season 1

It was weird how everything had come to this. Standing in a room with his dad and brother, the yellow-eyed bastard that had started their whole downward spiral into hunting controlling his body. Funnily enough though, the demon had his permission to do so.

A fact it used to torment John and Sam while it had them pinned to the walls.

He wondered where it all went wrong. He could say it was that year John abandoned him, or the months before that when Sam left, or he could reach all the way back to his early childhood to when the thing inside him pinned his mom to a ceiling and killed her. Truth was he had lots of reasons he could point at and blame, but at the end of the day he was just pissed off at his so-called family.

For years he had done what his father wanted, ever since he placed little Sammy into his too-young arms. He had towed the line, followed orders and watched Sammy as best he could. It didn't take John long to forget Dean was just a kid himself. But he did it as best he could because his job was to take care of Sammy.

For years he had put the kid's needs and wants above his. He'd hidden the truth of their life as long as he could to keep the boy somewhat innocent. He worked extra hard to make the best out of their situation and give Sammy what he could. Did it make a difference? Apparently not.

He'd been on his own for the past three years. John sent texts at first, giving his 'soldier' orders. Dean had dropped that cell two months after the man had high-tailed it away from him. He had originally held out, telling himself the man would be back. He was his dad after all and he loved him.

That little delusion crashed into a million pieces during a job in Virginia. He watched as a man, clearly a veteran much like his own father, had treated his son. A young man, who was actually an honest to god soldier. They were both gruff and not overly emotional, but they showed more love between them than he can ever remember getting from his own parent. Finding out his 'little secret' only solidified that fact.

Why hadn't he kept the phone so Sam could call him? Well his little bro had kindly ignored his calls and texts for four months after his departure to the glorious normality of college. Two more months of silence killed any thought of Sasquatch contacting him.

Not to say he didn't have anybody out there for him. He still had Pastor Jim, Bobby and Caleb. They had kindly agreed not to tell John anything about his whereabouts or his new contact information. Sometimes he would even team up with Caleb or Bobby, the former more often than not, to complete a hunt. Which turned out to be a good thing, since he was able to keep that demon bitch Meg from killing Caleb or Jim.

She had been upset with John and Sam, surprise, surprise.

He'd heard from Bobby that John had gone to Stanford to get Sam to come look for him. Not sure why considering he'd been absent from John's side for a good two years. Likely the old man just wanted to force one of his sons back to his side, so like usual he used Dean. All it had done was irritate Sam, cause another fight and get his live-in girlfriend killed by the demon.

This of course led his I-want-to-live-a-normal-life little brother back into the big bad world of hunting, looking for vengeance with a level of strength that almost rivaled their father's. And Sam always believed he had nothing in common with John. The kid was practically a carbon copy, temper and all.

Only he had a little extra in his package, being able to see visions and all. If John thought he kept that we well hidden secret he's sorely mistaken. Then again, Dean always could weed out the truth when he wanted to.

When Sam had a vision of their old hometown John had gotten a bit sneaky and had Missouri send out a call for help to Bobby. Not that he blamed the older hunter for sending him; he hadn't had all the information. Given the history of the town and the house involved he normally would have told her where to stick it, but the psychic woman had been adamant that it had to be him. So he sucked it up and went.

When he arrived to find Sam sitting on her couch having been dropped off by John he'd almost turned on his heel and marched back out. But the feisty lady managed to keep him there. He did refuse to speak to Sam about anything but the job, keeping his voice professional. Boy had that earned him a number of puppy-dog eyes and extreme pestering from the kid. However Sam had made it clear he wanted Dean gone from his life, not vice versa. After so many years without him or any of his blood family, it wasn't hard to ignore the same tactics that used to have him spilling his guts in no time.

Sam's shocked face could be considered priceless.

Regardless the hunt ended up just how he thought it would. Painful. Not only physically but emotionally as well.

His mom's spirit had saved them, or should he say she had saved Sam. She certainly hadn't done anything when the poltergeist was kicking his ass all over the place. No she had only looked at him for a moment, barely taking long enough to say his name. Then she turned her attention to Sam.

In a way he understood. Dean had had four wonderful years with his mom. Sam had barely six months. Didn't make it hurt any less.

When all was said and done Sam acted like they were supposed to team up and hunt together. Dean had shot that down real quick. Amazingly Missouri had kept quiet; a first since he'd stepped into town. The woman had criticized him, ordered him around and whacked him upside the head more than once. This time though he could almost feel that she was on his side.

Sam had sputtered and argued, clearly flabbergasted that Dean wouldn't agree.

"But dad said…"

"Since when do you listen to John?" He had caught a slight movement out of the corner of his eye, a shadow from one of Missouri's sitting rooms.

"Since when do you not?"

"Over two years now. Or did he not tell you?" From the look on the boy's face he'd guess that was a no. Likely John fed him some story that Dean had gone missing recently and he needed Sam's help.

Of course, he couldn't leave the kid completely hanging. He was his brother. So he'd offered to get him a heads up through Bobby or Pastor Jim if he heard anything about the demon before heading on his way with a quick goodbye thrown over his shoulder.

It had been hard, so very hard to leave his baby brother behind. However he easily remembered the pain and hurt he had experienced from his own abandonment and it steeled his resolve. He'd learned to keep others at a distance thanks to his 'family', to the point that he sometimes had problems letting Bobby, Jim or Caleb in.

So he had continued on his way, keeping an ear out on the movements of John and Sam. Bobby had let him have it for revealing he knew anything about Dean. Apparently John had gone to Singer's ready for war. Dean didn't feel too badly since he knew Bobby could handle himself.

In the mean time Dean continued to hunt and kept an ear out for mentions of the demon and his family. Just because he didn't want to see them didn't mean he wouldn't help if absolutely needed. He'd even managed to take down the striga that had almost killed Sam all those years ago. The very one his father couldn't kill. Of course he blamed it on Dean's inability to stay inside and watch Sam. That one incident had done a number on his already traumatized mind. Not only had he not kept an eye on Sam allowing that thing to get in, but he'd not been able to shoot it, too frozen with shock to try. Than again he didn't know many eleven year olds that could react better in that situation.

Probably the most bizarre yet humorous hunt he had taken on involved a Trickster. Loki had caused quite a bit of trouble on a college campus, which Dean found pretty funny. Under different circumstances he and the pagan god could have been friends, but he was a Hunter and he had a duty to protect people. It hadn't been pretty but he'd gotten the job done.

The second time he'd run into his family was during a vampire hunt. At first he hadn't been sure about what he'd been hunting, but the evidence and research all pointed in one direction. A few calls to his contacts verified that vampires did exist, though few in numbers. So he prepared himself the best he could and headed to their lair, an old barn deep in the woods. Imagine his surprise when John and Sam showed up just as he finished off the last one.

One might think that seeing your son standing in the middle of a room full of bodies, covered in blood and clearly injured would illicit some concern. Not for John Winchester. He simply asked if he'd seen a gun before searching the place on his own. Sam looked like he wanted to say something or even help him but managed to hold himself back. Once John had found what he wanted he'd left without so much as a goodbye, Sam trailing behind him like a good puppy. He wondered if that's how he looked so many years ago.

It all came to head though when Meg, the demon's minion tried to kill Jim. Dean and Caleb had been at his place resting after a rather nasty run in with a shape shifter. Between the three of them they managed to subdue her and send her back to hell. They did manage to get some information, mostly how mad she was at Sam and John for having the Colt.

It was during their interrogation of her that Dean got his idea. His wonderfully dangerous, extremely crazy idea.

He decided not to tell anyone about it, not in the mood to hear their protests or arguments. Instead he researched on his own in Bobby's library before heading out to put it into play. Dean and finalized the preparations the day before the demon found him and took him over.

Oh Dean had struggled and protested and made it hard for the bastard, however it had actually played into his hands. It hadn't been too hard to hide his true intentions from the beast, feeding it just enough of his thoughts and anger to make it think it knew everything.

But now the time had come for him to show his hand. Deep in his mind he stated the incantation.

John and Sam watched helplessly as the demon paraded around in Dean's body. He taunted them with those yellow eyes, telling them how much they had broken the one family member that would have done anything for them. It hurt because the words were true. However neither male admitted that to the thing holding them hostage.

Though just when the demon made a move to finish John off something strange happened. It froze, acid yellow eyes wide in disbelief.

Azazel couldn't believe it. The pitiful human inside of him had managed to trap him. How could he have not seen this? How did the boy keep such secrets from him? With one last effort the demon tried to force the boy's hand but it did no good. Like a switch going off the two traded places. Dean now had full control of his body and Azazel could do nothing about it.

Green eyes blinked as Dean's vision restored and he regained control of his body. The only difference was that he still had the demon's ability, which he used to keep John and Sam stuck to the wall. He finally had a captive audience.

"Well I see you two have done well against the demon," he muttered sarcastically. He let his eyes trail over both men noting their confusion. "Don't bother fighting, I'm not going to hurt you. But I do have some things to say."

"Stop it! You're not Dean," Sam yelled petulantly.

"Actually brainiac, I am. I found a way to trap that bastard inside of me and use his powers for a bit. Which is why you're still hanging around." He gave his younger brother a demeaning smirk. "I don't want you two knuckleheads to interrupt."

"You know, I gave a lot to this family. From the moment dad put Sam in my arms telling me to take him out of the house and protect him I stopped being a kid. You once asked me why I fell in line with Dad." He directed this at Sam. "I was four years old, my mom had just been killed and my world falling around me. I had no idea what was happening. All I knew was that I had one parent left and he was supposed to make it better. So of course I did what he said. It was the only thing I had to hold onto. By the time I realized he didn't want a son but a soldier I was already too set in my ways and you were more important. So I made sure you could be a kid as best as I could. Not that you seemed to care, the way you kept running off trying to be normal. Then you get brought back and it's my fault. I try to keep the peace and I get turned into a mindless drone in your mind." He snorted derisively. "You have no idea what would have happened to you if I hadn't acted like a buffer. You have no idea how many times I fought for you. And I did fight with him Sam, I just did it out of sight and in ways you can't seem to comprehend.

Though it wasn't enough I guess. After all you saw fit to cut me completely from your life once you went to school. Even though I was the one to support you going, I was the one to drop you off at the bus station and give you money to get you started. And you couldn't even pick up one of my calls or return a text just to let me know you were okay? Because you thought I would drag you back?" Dean frowned at his younger brother who looked a bit shamed at his words. "Who taught you to read? Who took you to school? Who helped you with projects? I even dropped out so he wouldn't force you to hunt more, because I knew he would if I didn't join him. I did everything I could to try and make your childhood happy, something I lost the day mom died. The only thing I asked was to be treated like a brother, but you couldn't even do that. Because having me as a brother would ruin your new sense of normal. Let me tell ya, that's pretty shitty Sam."

He let his gaze weigh heavily on the younger man, his words cutting deep. Almost as deep as the wounds left from Sam's continued rejection of him, but not quite.

"Then when you come back to this life you expected me to just accept it? To allow you the opportunity to hurt me again?" He heaved a heavy breath trying to push away the pain those words still brought him. "You made it clear you didn't want me in your life Sam. So I stayed away."

He turned from his brother and let his eyes settle on his father, ignoring Sam's small denial. The man stared back at him coldly, obviously believing this was the demon's trick. Well in the end he'd know the truth.

"I was four. I just lost Mom in a rather horrific way. I know it was hard for you but you were supposed to take care of me. Take care of us," he stated evenly, his voice dropping to a near whisper. "Instead you let your anger and hate blind you to your 'duty'. You became obsessed with the demon and dragged Sam and me down with you. We're your kids John, not your soldiers. But in your mad obsession you forgot that. For a long time I thought I understood, thought I could be what you wanted me to be, what you needed. But I was just a kid and it was too much.

You always said you wanted us to know how to defend ourselves, but you could have taught us easily from a stable location. You could have learned and trained us without the full hunt. But no, you had to go to extremes. Only thing is you didn't just sacrifice yourself but your sons too." He paused meaningfully. "Or I guess I should say two of your sons." He felt vindicated when the man's eyes widened. "Yeah I know about Adam. I know about you taking him to baseball games and treating him like a father should. Makes what you did to us all that much worse. And you can use the excuse that he has his mother all day long, but it won't change the fact that you've treated him more like a true son than you have either of us."

He turned slightly from John eyes falling on the old colt. "I also know that you found out the demon's plans for Sam. Not that you told him." A quick glance at Sam confirmed this. "No you decided to use him as bait to lure the demon out. Instead of keeping Sam from following the same path of revenge you've plowed for years you fed the beast, dragging him further down this dark road. Do you two really think this is what mom or Jessica want? For you to destroy your lives?"

He shook his head. "Yeah, I hunt too. But at least I do it because I honestly want to help people. And let's face it, I'm not really fit for anything else, you saw to that John."

Almost carelessly he picked up the colt, weighing it in his hands, familiarizing himself with the weapon. Deep within he could feel the demon struggling harder. It must have finally figured out his plan.

No matter.

"Well this is the end boys. Sam can go back to his perfect normal life and pretend he was never a part of this family. I do hope you find happiness and know that I do love you. John, well, you can rot in hell for all I care at this point. I would tell you I hope this is worth your revenge," he stated calmly, turning fully to the older man and ignoring Sam. "But knowing you, I doubt you'll care as long as it's dead." He felt some satisfaction, as John's eyes grew wide with realization and disbelief. "Don't worry about the body. I left Bobby instructions on what I want done."

In one smooth swift move he brought the colt to his head and pulled the trigger, the blast drowning out the cries of denial from the other two men.

With one decisive move Dean Winchester finished his final hunt, taking down the demon that started the destruction of his family.


End file.
